No shaking, Presido still dey kampe

Ehen, dem don talk am. The court people dem, dem don talk say Yardy still dey kampe, say the other two contestants dem, make dem siddon for corner. For those of una wey no know wetin dey happen, make i give una gist. Dem talk say because of all those palaver dem during elections, say mr presido must to comot, but na na, the court people don talk say Presido must to continue im job. Presido self, happy for the matter come dey promise some more promises join the matter, say im go rule us well well, make we just dey wait to see. We dey wait.

Una do well.

Ibori and Igbenedion: Dem don waka!

Dem don grant the former governors for BENDEL, bail. Na Ibori represent Delta for prison, Igbenedion na im represent the Benin part. Anyway, dem don comot. Dem say dem don grant dem bail from prison. Me self, I shock. The one wey dem dey there na prison? place where generator, ac, carpet, chef self dey, na dat one dem call prison? Na wa oh! Anyway, dem go dey party dis night sha.

One yeye senator go do "kpali runs". Na one American woman im go marry because of "paper", pikin self, dey the matter.

Egypt win the African cup self. I salute them. Dem try.

Una do well.

Niger Delta and their wahala

This wahala no dey end, everybody dey "task" everybody to do something. MEND don talk say na them attack one kain base for shell come kill three navy men join. Dem don begin their wahala again because dem talk say nobody dey answer dem. Meanwhile one kain comittee for UN, come inspect the whole thing, their own conclusion be say na "trust" be the wahala. Laugh be wan kill me, before nko? Na today dem know say poor man no dey trust anybody ? I take God beg una!

Armed robbers: Na dem don take over Lagos and infact, na dem get Nigeria. Police no even fit battle dem ,all the guns dem, dem talk say Obasanjo brother in law don thief dem long time ago, so now, na hand dem dey take fight machine gun.

Football: Because of that useless match, people dey cry, dey vex, so tey one young man die self! Na wa oh, shebi una see the kain thing wey poor man don dey take serious? na the only thing wey dem get, and dat one self, don kpafuka!

Strike: Dem dey strike for all the courts dem.

Una do well.

Ghana 2-Nigeria 1

Okay, una know say I no know too much about football, but I go just write wetin my eye see. Na so football start, everybody just dey play, i just dey happy. Na so, we come get penalty, we come score, na Yakubu score the thing. Ehen, na so, we dey play, dey win dey go, until dat Essien man come equalize and na second remain oh for the half time, dat one come finish. We come enter second half, those Ghanians dey wild oh, see as dem just dey struggle, dey push, dey pull, all sorts, until one of dem come carry red card. Na so, i just dey happy, I think say na win be dat oh, ehen. But the Ghanians dem, one juju spirit just enter dem, na so dem just dey attack anyhow, so tey dem come shook hand for dat small boy eye, Obi Mikeal. Na so, oh, dem just dey vex anyhow, one Agogo man, dat man, just be like bulldozer,if you see im head alone, you go fear. Na so, the man just dey worry our goalkeeper anyhow, im worry dem so tey im come score im own, I say the juju spirit wey enter am ehn! Anyway, na so match dey go, Nigeria try oh! haba! dat Odimigwe, plus Yakubu, plus Taye, plus Shittu, infact all of dem try but dem no get the kain spirit wey enter those Ghanian boys dem. Anyway, na so our boys try well well, remain small self, dem for score. Anyway, na so match finish oh, i pity our boys sha, anyway, as everybody always dey get man of the match, the person wey make me laugh tire na dat our goal keeper,Ejide, the guy try no be small, dey fly left right and center, dey shout anyhow, I like am, na im get the kain juju spirit wey dem Ghana boys get.

Una do well.